Tag Archives: ubiquitous dog-carrier

Review: Stars Are Blind – Paris Hilton

Wealthy heiress and socialite, Paris Hilton has long been rumoured to be keen on a career in popular music. As early as two years ago, news spread like wildfire that she was planning to create and release an album which would serve to strengthen her position as multimedia goddess and icon of the mid 2000’s nekulturny.

It is perfect that this woman’s first moves into the public consciousness were with stimulant-dulled eyes as she preformed fellatio on a ‘stud’ known by some as a pornographer and by others as the son of a Warner Bros. executive. How marvellously apt that she earns royalties from perverts and misogynists who wish to purchase a film of her uninspired and loveless copulation.

So to the single, a ‘reggae-influenced’ mishmash of this season’s popular sounds, floated over by an autotuned and yet perversely tuneless girl’s voice. Everyone knows that girls can’t sing. This landmark song, completing Hilton’s trajectory from banal, ubiquitous dog-carrier to banal, ubiquitous model/actress/singer/whatever has, I’m reliably informed, been compared to both Gwen Stefani and Blondie. Ms Stefani’s 2005 song, ‘Rich Girl’ springs to mind, if only for the sensation it induced of a fatuous and self-important airhead making stupid people believe that what she thinks is in some way valid or interesting. Stefani and Hilton are both rich girls, so who cares what they think?

The lyrics of ‘Stars Are Blind’ are, on the whole, as stupid as the song’s title. I quote:

Even though the gods are crazy
Even though the stars are blind
If you show me real love baby
I’ll show you mine

Forgetting that we’ve already seen ‘hers’.

Those other guys all wanna take me for a ride
But when I walk their talk is suicide
Some people never get beyond their stupid pride
But you can see the real me inside
And I’m satisfied, oh no, ohh

Paris Hilton is a girl whose every wish can become reality. Her separation from ordinary life is what made her such an amusing and disgusting ‘character’. Her lack of character made us treat her with less contempt than she might have received for being an utterly contemptible person. But now, the tables have turned. Paris Hilton is no longer satisfied with the dull and unconsidered ambivalence of hundreds of millions of people; she wants, she needs their love. And she’ll get it, because she’s Paris Hilton.

‘Stars Are Blind’ stormed into the US single chart at #18 in June. 0/1