Noel Edmonds has made a new play in his “biggest wanker ever” campaign. Now neck and neck with Jeremy Clarkson (no relation), Edmonds has called for immigrants to be thrown out and the UK’s borders closed. According to the News Of The World:

“We can all go down the pub and go, ‘Oh it’s terrible, all these immigrants.’ But what are we going to do in Britain to change this toxic culture if we don’t say, ‘Enough is enough.’

“If I was Prime Minister for a day the first thing I would do would be to close the border.

“Then we could work out how many people we’ve got here.

“Then you get people out who have committed crimes and you look at others who shouldn’t be here. Nobody knows how many people we’ve got here.”

Indeed. I avoided the boycott of TeleCinco for their anti-Catalan stance because I’m not that keen on boycotts. But Noel “cunt” Edmonds has made me rethink my position. “Noel’s HQ”, the wanker’s new vehicle, will be avoided at all costs. Well, it would have been anyway, but now I won’t even tune in to see if he kills another guest.