There are many things I’m crap at. From political predictions to basic plumbing, I’m crap at it.

Today’s edition is particularly poignant as it ruins conversations all the time. Whether it’s talking about Bonfire of the Vanities or Nighty Night, I can never, ever, remember the characters’ names. Watching The Wire (the best TV show ever – and more on that later) – I can, of course remember MacNulty and Stringer Bell. But I regularly forget Marlo’s, Herc’s, Carver’s and Rawl’s names. (No spoilers here… except perhaps finding out that Marlo takes over in a reign of murders is a spolier).

The same applies to literature. I rack my brains to remember the main characters’ names in The Corrections or Hamlet (well, except the obvious ones). I forget Bukowski’s rich girlfriend’s name, I forget the names of Socrates’s opponents…

I believe that this might be connected to my terrible memory for both faces and names… a double affliction which has forever rendered me awkward or overly-friendly at society events.